Sweating thru August

 

Half of August is over and it has been an incredibly HOT summer w/little rain. The grass I planted for the SECOND year in a row has met the same demise as last year - brown/crunchy like my fave potato chips. I guess next Spring I'll try it again.

Nothing new has been happening here. I've self-diagnosed myself with Fibromyalgia. I have no other explanation for the aches/pain I feel in my back, abdomen, boobs, shoulders, hands and feet. Mom suffered w/these same things w/no one believing her. I googled if it was hereditary - it is. Not thru a gene or anything but some other explanation. I thought it would be from the physicality of my job; muscle strain of lifting, etc., but it's more than that. I'll mention it to Dr. Cola next month but in the meanwhile, I've discovered 'Yoga for Fibro' videos (thanks, YouTube). Slow, easy, gentle stretches help big time. Do whatcha gotta do, eh?

Things are changing at the store. I can't put my finger on it but it seems kinda bleak. Corporate has sent petty rules down the chain & it's stolen my mojo. I still show up & tackle my job w/both feet, but the joy is leaking out like a tire w/a nail in it. I try my best to be 'chipper' but most days, I can't muster it. Kind, patient and nice, but my spunk is missing. I work alone a lot so it's easy to be quiet and to myself. Hopefully, this is a phase.

Until next time ...

June is here

Happenings:

• I turned 62. Nothing big, no fanfare or celebration
• I spent four days @ my sister's home about 50 miles North. It was nice to get away but after four days, I was ready to be back home. 
• That's the first time I've been anywhere in years (if you really count 50 miles North 'anywhere)
• I planted a garden on wheels w/veggies & herbs and copious amounts of flowers I saved from death at the store. Everything looks very nice.
• I decorated my porch in a red theme this year. I don't have visitors so I pretty much enjoy it alone.
• I've been working a lot of hours because I don't really have anything else to do.
• I still miss my son deeper than words can say. Grief if never-ending.
• Even though I don't miss Dwayne, the thought that he died here alone while waiting on the ambulance during his heart attack hit me hard over the last couple of days. Heavy tears were shed.
• I still have my guy friend I talk/or text w/daily. I haven't seen him in the flesh but a handful of times since October 2024. Another story for another day.
• I joined "Substack" but don't really like it. Lol. I don't like the idea of having to pay to read folks' thoughts. They're truly not important to me.
• My sister is really pushing for me to create a book and/or calendar w/my photos. I've been starting and not following thru for years. We'll see.
• Temps, humidity & dew point levels are to become unbearable over the next few days. I don't have my A/C's in my windows so I'm hoping not to be miserable for too much longer
• On my off day (Thursday), I try to 'date' myself. The local museum was nice recently.
• I haven't done anything more to the spare room that I was chomping at the bits to paint. I patched a couple of holes in the wall but that's it. I'll try to get on that very soon.
• Oh, I'm lonely.

"March"-ing On

Well, it seemed like January lasted for 75 days, February lasted 2 and now March is here. My town didn't get a lot of snow this Winter, but the temps were simply brutal. I can handle cold; that's what they make the 'big coat', lovely squishy warm scarves and cute gloves for. Folks complained like it was something new. 😖

I've been reading over @ "Substack" a lot lately and today I created a profile. I don't know how often I'll write over there since I love my space here and have had it for-ever. But I was moved by the positivity and community and felt like I wanted to be a part of it. Then the introverted part of myself told me to post here. My fave writer there (so far) is "Alex Elle" and she's created a challenge called "joy spotting." I think it's the coolest. I didn't commit to join in but the idea is novel. 

I've been off work for 3 consecutive days (forced vacay) and it's so nurturing. Days off are usually Thursday/Sunday so it's nice to wake up on my own, sit in the quiet (TV rarely gets turned on) and let my mind wander. I've been trying to give my place the love it doesn't get when I'm working and I definitely feel like it's giving me a hug back. 🤗

Here're some 'joy spots' from this morning.

New diffuser. Me & the plants love it.

Yes, it's crooked. Lol. I fixed it, but you need much more than love.

"The Coffee Station." Coffee sign is placemat from Dollar Tree.

I don't know why I love things that SAY what they are.

Seeeee???????

Love how the rising sun lights up 'the jungle.' So do they.

Forgot I had this. Putting it to work.

I hope you find your spots of joy daily and embrace them. Gratitude is an amazing feeling.

Until next time ... 💋