I surrendered...

... to the rain that dominated the day.

it gave my mind permission, to wander, drift & stray

it gave my imagination time to dream, create & play

it allowed my body to obey my bed's call to gather books & lay

it called to me & and asked that I listen to its patter

to close my eyes & appreciate the sound of wet birds' chatter

So I surrendered to the rain and let it calm me down

to all the beauty that it is, beauty, all around.


"my" pictures :-)
sunday scribbling word prompt: "surrender"

God's Guest List

I happened upon a wonderful book @ the library a few weeks ago by one of my favorite inspirational writers, Debbie Macomber, called "God's Guest List." I enjoyed it so much, I didn't want it to end. It finally gave me an answer of what to say about people whom have passed through my life.

When I was a young(er) adult, I came to pieces when life changed and folks I had become comfortable with moved on for whatever reason. Now after all these years, even though I still miss them and fall back on memories of these people, I realize that these were people that God put in my life for a reason - for that season.

After reading this book, I deeply thought about each person that I know or used to know and tried to recognize what our purposes were in each others lives; most of these people are co-workers from here to Los Angeles. One friend that I met while living in L.A. and still have a relationship w/just called me the other day in a panic & needed a 'voice of reason' (from me??? LOL). God put us on each others lists and we're still there after nearly 24 years.

Our families are on our guest list, our children, our parents. It's an amazing read and great food for thought. And now, I try to make myself of aware of my interaction with people in my life everyday; Nelson, my homeless friend, my sweet blogger friend, Makeda, whom I feel as close to as a sister, the elderly lady in the market whom hugged me for a good five minutes after I told her hair was beautiful - we all have guests lists. Even the "prickly people" Ms. Macomber spoke of - folks who are less than pleasant are on our lists as well. We just need to recognize everyone when they "RSVP."


Most of the folks I remember involved lots of laughter. I'm guessing I was put on their lists to give them a laugh for that season. I'm guessing I'm on Nelson's list cause he sorely needs acceptance just for who he is, not the way he looks; God put Makeda on my list because he knows I adore the person she is & because she lifts me up; my ex husband came along to give me my beautiful son, my parents, my siblings. It's amazing!




Pictures by: me :-)

Loving the Countryside

On Saturday, Son had a track meet in a small, beautiful town nearly an hour south of us called Carrollton. It still very 'vintage' with small shops, a town square. It truly looked like we had landed in 'Mayberry.' Of course, while I waited on the events to begin, I had to wander the surroundings w/my camera. It was a cool, sunny morning but I was transfixed by the rolling green hills dotted w/dandelions, the big old farm houses sitting atop hills, cows & horses grazing in pastures.

But mostly what got me was the quiet. I could feel any trace amounts of stress melt away.

I want to live there now. :-)




Pictures by: me :-) (Don't you adore the red porch swing?) I helped myself to a seat for a spell, until I remembered, I was supposed to be cheering on my Son's track events (ooops!! :-))

Cause & Effect

This little section was from a recent "Daily Om":

" ...Thus, as we interact with others, how we behave can be as important as who we are. If we project our passion for life, our warmth, and our tolerance in our facial features, voice, and choice of words, every person who enters our circle of influence will leave our presence feeling at peace with themselves and with us. You never know whose life you are affecting, big or small. Try to remember this as you go out into the world each day."

I keep this in mind as I go about every minute of my day. There is no possible way if you ever leave your house that you will not have to deal with others. I believe that no matter what type of mood I may be in, I cannot put that on others.

Recently, a friend was rude to me . My feelings were hurt so my hurtful action was to stop speaking to him, to back off - give him his space. I didn't know what brought on his rudeness, so I closed myself off to him. Long story short, when we got a chance to talk, he told me that on that day of his rudeness, he had just been served with divorce papers. The divorce is nasty; 2 small children are in the middle. Lots of emotion & anger. Then on top of it all, he said I stopped speaking to him ...

I did not realize what was happening in his life and I know it's something he would've shared with me if I hadn't taken the action that I did. I was only thinking of self. I apologized for my behavior & all that he is going thru & offered my ear - anytime.

This brings me to my favorite thought:

“Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a harder battle.” Plato

Apologies to you , friend - I cannot wait for us to get back to how we were.




Picture by: me :-) (my daily drive to work - Lake Cable, Ohio)

Swaping Spring

Aren't these beautiful??? I think so. I want to thank Debbie for all the beautiful goodies she sent in the Spring Photo Swap through The Sweet Light. Debbie is quite the talented photographer and sells her beauties at a market booth in her hometown. One funny thing is, Debbie also sent me a beautiful picture of a bumble bee on a cornflower - I took that exact same picture last summer. They're identical!!! What are the odds? Like minds were perfectly matched, even through total randomness.

Check out Debbie's beautiful things at her 'Natural Light Photography' Etsy shop. It's heaven! Thank you for everything Debbie & The Sweet Light! :-)

Wisdom to know the difference...

The homeless dude at the library, Nelson, previously told me that he had a special stone for me. For hours on end, this guys sits @ the library with a huge magnifying glass studying all shapes & sizes of rocks, while comparing them to an archeological book. I had to admit, I was anxious to see what he came up with.

I looked for him there this past Saturday. When I saw him, I did my usual (fishing out my $1 bills to slide to him quietly). When he saw me, he lit up & said, 'I have that stone for you.' I walked around while I gave him time to dig thru his belongings, then he approached me with my 'special' stone.

Nelson amazed me with his knowledge of rocks & references from the book he studied. He was very animated & funny while he showed me 'the red tint' the rock held, and how he recovered it from deep in one of our local creek beds, but had shined it up for me. While I listened, I really looked at him, and underneath all of his "homelessness," I could tell that when he had it going on, Nelson was a pretty attractive guy. I also wondered when, why & how his life crashed and burned.

I treasure the tiny rock, which I instantly noticed was heart shaped. When I pointed out the shape to Nelson, he looked at me like I was crazy (LOL!) - he saw it in a totally different way than I, which is cool. I didn't see a 'red tint, either, but beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

I wrapped my special stone in tissue & put it in my pocket till i got home. It is amazingly heart shaped, which I find perfect under the circumstances. There is so much I treasure about it:

• it's from Nelson (who, for a person down on his luck, is one of the happiest folks I've run into)
  
• he thought enough of me to give up one of his precious stones
• the way we laughed & talked to each other while others watched in awe

And even though to me, the rock looks like this:

To Nelson, it looks like this:
.... and that's just perfect for me! :-)


Pictures: Internet courtesy

The List inside the Bucket

Internet Image

I don't know why I've never attempted to create a bucket list. Maybe cause I never allow myself to dream too wildly, which is not good. That's what dreams are for, aren't they? Or I do not allow myself to dream anything that I know damn well I'll never do, but again - that's why they're called dreams.

So, today, I've decided to let myself go, climb out & dream. 10,000, 1,000, 500, 100 or even 50 seem overwhelming right now, so I'll start w/15 - a nice, small, number.

1. visit the coastal islands of Georgia
2. " " Sanibel Beach, Florida, & add to my shell collection
3. " " Italy
4. " " Greece
   
5. open a restaurant for the homeless; no money required
6. own a bookstore
7. own a big, old farmhouse w/wraparound porch
8. learn to ride a horse
9. own a nursery
10. photograph L.A. from the "Hollywood" sign
11. display my photographs at an art gallery
12. spend a week on an exotic, luxury island
13. wear a slinky, sexy dress w/spaghetti straps
14. attend a real "high end" occasion that will require said dress
15. rent a cabin in the Blue Ridge Mountains
    

Kind of a sad list, isn't? I mean, what's wild about these things? These are very normal, "do-able" things. I mean, you don't see anything uninhibited, like 'swim the Serengeti', or "bungy jump off the side of a cliff," you know? I think this list kinda shows how I limit myself and "keep safe' I am, even in my dreams.

Wonder when will I wake up & live my best life?




Sky picture by: me :-)

10 words i love to hate

1. The "N" word
2. The "B" word
3. The "hate" word
4. "Retard"
5. "Stupid"
6. "Dumb"
7. all slang words re: a person's ethnicity
   
8. trash (when referring to a person)
9. "deaf & dumb" (deaf people have got us hearing folk beat by a mile.... or two)
10. any negative word directed to a child or a person w/low self-esteem
    

Pic by: me
Daydreaming on Paper: "list 10 words that you hate"

Love Thursday: Silently

“There are times when silence has the loudest voice” Leroy Brownlow

I haven't been able to find my voice on any subject lately. My brain dead-ends at any thought, yet I'm having so many thoughts, I cannot get a hold on any of them. I'm in an empathetic period, trying to keep seeing the light in everything in this crazy world. So, just to let you (and me) know that I'm still here, I post silently.

Happy, quiet, thoughtful, prayerful, Love Thursday.





Picture: by me :-)
Candle in my bedroom that gives off a great glow & comfort